Introduction to male masturbation

Welcome guys (and ladies, who are are curious to know what and how men do when they please themselves)! With this site, I am making a statement that masturbation is a good thing, with many positive effects (if done right), and nothing to hide or be ashamed of. Actually, I would love if people took a more relaxed stance towards masturbation, and one would more often catch someone "in the act" in public. Not gonna happen, I know - but you get the idea. The internet can help...

Let me reiterate: I am a wanker, and I enjoy it. And if you are male you most probably belong to the majority who regularily masturbate, too. Most men have done it many hundred if not thousand times over their lifetime, and thus might consider themselves proficient in doing so, or "experts". But as having had sex very often just does not automatically make you a "good" lover, wanking a lot does not guarantee that you get the most out of it, and avoid negative side-effects. Why is this relevant?

The "Male Autoerotic Quickie" (MAQ)

Especially now, in the internet era, I suspect that most men masturbate in the same manner most of the time, which I call the Male Autoerotic Quickie (MAQ): Single-handedly wanking, sitting in front of a computer screen and watching porn (or with the smartphone or tablet in one hand or propped up in front of you). Sitting, staring on the screen, and wanking, so as to orgasm just after a few minutes. An orgasm always feels good and alleviates tension, I give you that, but I see the MAQ just as an unworthy shortcut. Neither is it very interesting to do, nor to watch (see the video below), and the excitement might diminish over time. It is no more creative than quick sex with your partner in always the same position, just with the goal to "finish" asap.

Is this something new? Maybe not completely. Before the internet, you could do a similar thing with sex magazines or porn movies on VHS tape or DVD. But I suppose it has aggravated. Internet porn is just too easily available, and has in itself the potential to become addictive. Obviously the urge to get the hand in your pants while doing so comes naturally. It is, in fact, much easier than to use your imagination.

Maybe that's not true for everybody - at least it is my experience that the internet drastically changed my autoerotic habits. Before the internet era, I used to do it in more varied ways, on the bed, humping things, sitting, standing, lying down, indoors or outdoors, at home or stealthily in public places, with or without visual stimulation, often just imagining things I like, sometimes using toys etc. etc. After internet porn became available to me, "me and my right hand", sitting in front of my computer, gradually became the dull standard jerk-off. Even though the variety of visual stimulation was much greater than before, what I did was almost always the same. Luckily, after a few years, I finally got bored, rediscovered "older" techniques and thought of many new ways to do it - with great benefits. But I still do the MAQ from time to time, no shame in that, who would not? It's a good way to release tension when you do not have more time or energy.

A few words about porn. Of course, I do not claim that easy access to porn, sexual pleasure, or self-love is bad. Ian Kerner, Ph.D, sexuality counselor, sex therapist and author, claims: “...the benefits of porn far outweigh the downsides. ... I believe there is also a real positive role of porn and that masturbation is super healthy in many ways, including helping people regulate their moods or cope with depression or anxiety. Porn can also help people get in touch with their unique erotic templates, experiment with different tastes and fetishes without the real-live risk...”
But there is a downside, as I've mentioned on the page Why masturbate. Kerner advises, much in line what I'm trying to do here: “If men masturbate a lot, they can develop a very idiosyncractic masturbation pattern where they’re stimulating themselves the same way every time in very specific way. This can result in having a hard time reaching orgasms with a partner so it can be good to take a break from masturbating, switching hands, or switching techniques” (cited after Mashable.com: How tech is reshaping male masturbation).

What's the alternative?

Everything else in this section is dedicated to one goal: switching techniques, that is bringing more creativity and variation into your self-love events, and thus transform the boring "quickie" jerk-off routine into something more sophisticated, more satisfactory, more exciting, and beneficial. That could mean things like doing it in other places, even in public, or using toys, water jets, hump things, and much more. Do you want to be a good lover? Become a good self-lover!

So read on, check out my other articles on male masturbation in general, get inspired by Tom's Autoerotic Journal, consider some of my Inspirations articles, or enjoy the Guest Contributions.

I have published an episode called Wanking to porn: a more sophisticated version, in which I suggest how you can even turn the MAQ into something much more cultivated and rewarding (and more arousing to watch, imho).

Or, for starters, here's a gallery of not-so-standard ways to masturbate.

Continue with Erogenous zones